3rd Trimester

Last week we welcomed the start of the third trimester. It rolled in with leg cramps and panic dreams (like last night I just forgot my baby boy somewhere during my day. When I finally remembered that I had forgot him, I had to retrace my steps in a panic and had apparently visited some very strange places during my dream-day). I can't quite believe that we are already at the beginning of the end (of the beginning). When I announced to my husband that, horray!, we have made it to the 3rd trimester, he tells me, "Oh, I'm not looking forward to all that labor business again; that was really hard last time." Yes, you have read that correctly. HE told ME that the labor part was hard and HE is not looking forward to it again.

Now, to be fair, it's true that the labor was hard and my hubby was an excellent birthing partner. For some various reasons, all of which I can't even remember now, I wanted to attempt a 'natural' birth with Adrienne (A.K.A. sans epidural). I have heard that some people who take epidurals are able to watch movies and such while laboring. This sounds so foreign from our laboring experience that I may want to give it a try the next time. Without an epidural, I depended a great deal on Regis to help me out, to jump at my every whim and need. Neither of us really knew what we were getting into prior to this day. So when they moved me to the active labor ward at 7:30 in the morning, my hubby probably wished he had stopped to get breakfast, or at the very least coffee. The fact that he had to forgo coffee on this day probably is a good testament to how hard it was for him. And of course we labored right on through lunch, by which time I certainly wouldn't let him leave me for a second. I'm not even sure I let him go to the bathroom. I did have him walk me to the bathroom several times, but I don't recall there being a men's toilet. But of course nobody really cares about the comfort of their birthing partners while in the middle of labor, right? As we progressed, I was literally dependent on him to tell me to breathe, since my natural reaction was to hold my breath and push (against the strict advice of the labor nurse, who had warned us that we were not to the pushing phase yet). I know I couldn't have done it without him. My husband has also had the good sense to never teased me about the ridiculous things I was saying while in labor. For example, at 8 cm I decided I was in fact ready for my epidural and was informed that we were way past the therapeutic window. So I asked the nurse to kindly pack me up, because my due date was not for another 3 weeks, and we would come back in 3 weeks where I would smartly take my epidural right away. I remember believing this could actually be done and feeling somewhat frustrated that they were not complying with my simple request. I also distinctly remember telling Regis that we were going to adopt any future kids. As I write this, number 2 is kicking me in the ribs. How quickly we forget. He also knew exactly when to lie during labor, like telling me I was lovely, that I was doing a good job, and that there was very little blood (even though I could tell from his face that the whole things was over-whelming and disgusting).  Except for the beautiful baby part. I suppose that's why we find ourselves in the situation again. That being said, I need no reminding of how difficult labor was. I list a few reasons here why my hubby is entitled to feel that labor was hard, but you will just have to trust me when I tell you that I did the lion's share of the work that day. 

Speaking of lion's shares, a colleague of mine recently reminded me that after Adrienne was born, my hubby was telling people that the hardest part of having a baby was the naming. The NAMING. I remember being totally surprised by this at the time, since 'choosing a name' wouldn't even make the top 10 list of difficult things about having a baby for me. Ha! I wish the hardest part was the naming, not the morning sickness, weight gain, heartburn, labor and birth, etc...  This just goes to show how ridiculously skewed the workload scales are in the female's direction when it comes to reproduction. However, one must be careful for what one wishes. There is a good chance that choosing baby boy's name will be even worse than the entire pregnancy and labor this round for me. It might just be the influence of the hormones and I generally leave these feelings of paranoia to my hubby, but I sometimes I think my husband might be purposely trying to drive me crazy with this issue. And there is a small chance it might be working...

So, dear son, I would advice you to get comfy and stay put till the very end of this trimester. Mommy and Daddy still have a lot of debating to do!